〈 Chapter 348 〉 Regret (2)
*
“I’m sorry.”
“I can’t do it, Raniel.”
“I’m sorry, but… I can’t become like you.”
The rain poured down.
In the pouring rain, Kyle smiled bitterly.
“I’m not suited to be a hero.”
His finger pointed at me.
“It’s you, Raniel.”
“What do you mean?”
“You’re more suited than I am…”
“Get up.”
He grabbed me by the collar and pulled me up.
I shouted. I screamed, but Kyle just pointed at me with a blank expression. I can’t forget that day’s memory.
No.
I became unable to forget.
*
【Raniel van Trias.】
The voice of the Star.
【Blessings to the new hero.】
Damn that voice of the Star echoed in my ears.
Raniel slowly dropped her gaze. In her eyes, she could see the starlight rising from her own body.
Starlight. The voice of the Star. And her own condition.
The information given was piecing together.
Information linked together to form a context. Even though she didn’t want to understand, the situation began to make sense to Raniel.
She had become a hero.
An irreplaceable starlight had been transferred.
An impossible feat had been accomplished.
Naturally, to achieve the impossible, a proper cost is required. To give a price and obtain what you desire. Mages call it a transaction. The transaction had been made. Where? And by whom?
‘Transaction.’
The moment the word crossed her mind, memories of the North flooded back. Kyle, who had made an unidentified contract with the Star. What expression did he have when I screamed at him to break that contract?
「That can’t be.」
He smiled bitterly as he said it.
「I can’t let it go.」
He was smiling sadly at me.
Now, Raniel finally understands the meaning of that smile. She realizes what Kyle sought to achieve despite imposing such constraints on himself.
“…”
Raniel’s fingertips trembled.
Her pupils shook wildly as she gazed at the starlight rising from her body. Cold sweat trickled down her spine.
Contract, transaction, starlight.
Right, Kyle must have made some kind of contract.
Though she didn’t know how, he had done something.
He seemed to have transferred the starlight to me? Damn it. To say I’m suited to be a hero, he really did pass it on. Yeah, whatever… sure.
But.
But the starlight can’t be just passed over, can it?
It wouldn’t just transfer because you wish for it.
Simply imposing such constraints wouldn’t be enough. To achieve this, something… a task must be completed.
‘Task.’
Fighting Death’s Blade.
Kyle said I must come here.
That suspicious guy who was moving around.
‘He said there is one left now.’
If it’s after Death’s Blade.
Then the next is.
Next, is.
Ah.
No way.
【Fulfill the given fate…】
“Shut your mouth.”
Raniel cut off the voice that was trying to whisper in her ear. She does not trust the Star. Especially not now.
“…no.”
Raniel exhaled.
“No, hey.”
She smiled.
“No.”
In a trembling voice, she murmured.
“No, that can’t be. No.”
She started to walk.
Her condition was completely back to normal, but for some reason, Raniel’s legs were shaking. Staggering, she grabbed the doorknob.
She opened the door and stepped outside.
As the door opened, she saw Rosel standing up abruptly and looking at her, but Raniel did not meet his gaze. She walked on.
‘No.’
One step.
‘No, right?’
Another step.
Staggering, she looked around for Kyle, the one who had transferred the starlight to her. He had to be here somewhere. She needed to get an explanation from that guy. It was absolutely necessary.
The hypotheses floating in her mind were just mere conjectures. It can’t be true. She hoped he would deny all these theories.
With that hope, Raniel walked.
Stumbling through the mansion.
She moved in search of someone she believed wouldn’t be here. Although she usually thought the mansion wasn’t that wide, right now, it felt horrendously big.
And then, snap.
Someone grabbed Raniel’s wrist.
She exhaled, having just held her breath. It wasn’t the touch of her master. Trembling slightly, Raniel slowly turned her head. When she turned, there…
“…Cardi.”
Cardi stood there.
Not Kyle, but Cardi was there. Raniel looked at Cardi and smiled. She grabbed Cardi’s arm with trembling hands.
“Hey, Cardi.”
“…”
“Where’s Kyle? Where is that idiot? He couldn’t have thought of this alone.”
You also helped out, didn’t you?
That was just a sedative, right? I know. I know you lied. Still, maybe you went along with it just because you were worried. You looked so distressed back then.
But.
“…Raniel.”
But why do you still have that expression on your face?
“Kyle.”
Raniel raised her voice.
“Where’s Kyle, you bastard!”
Cardi replied.
“…he’s not here.”
“So where is he?”
“I don’t know. He must be somewhere in Phantom Territory.”
“Oh, he must be doing remarkably well? After all, he became a superhuman even after losing the starlight…”
“Raniel.”
“My words.”
Raniel tightened her grip on Cardi’s arm.
“Say I’m right, Cardi.”
“…”
“You know I’m not thinking that, right? No?”
Tell me I’m wrong.
Before the pleading tone of Raniel, Cardi squeezed his eyes shut. Then, he managed to squeeze out a word.
“You know, Raniel.”
Cardi declared.
“What you think is right.”
He delivered the truth to Raniel.
Cardi couldn’t bring himself to utter lies. He conveyed the facts as they were, plainly.
“Kyle Toven is dead.”
Raniel didn’t say a word.
She didn’t even ask why.
Raniel smiled. She spoke while smiling.
“…to save me?”
The question was not one that awaited an answer.
She also knew the answer.
Raniel could no longer turn away from the conclusion pieced together in her mind. She released Cardi’s arm. Not finding any reason to stand any longer, her legs weakened, and she sank to the ground.
Thud, she sat down.
Raniel lowered her head. She looked at her hands. Only the rising starlight entered her view. Raniel completely understood the situation.
“Why.”
Like a puppet with its strings cut, Raniel muttered.
“Why is this happening?”
No one was there to answer that question.
3.
Raniel understood her own condition well. She should have been dead. Her lifespan had reached its limit, and her body was deteriorating. Her soul was irreparably damaged.
Only broken beyond repair.
Raniel knew better than anyone that the only fate left for her was a miserable death. Knowing that, she felt fear.
Fear of a death that could leave nothing behind.
Fear of a death filled with regrets.
Raniel knew there was no way to escape that death. She understood that it was impossible. Yet, that impossible thing had just happened.
“…”
Her body was fine.
The broken soul had been fully restored.
She drifted further than ever from death. Though released from fear, something heavier pressed against Raniel’s mind. Slowly, she lifted her head.
“Explain.”
She glared at Cardi.
While glaring, she demanded an explanation.
“First, get up—”
“I said to explain.”
“…”
Letting out a brief sigh, Cardi explained to Raniel without including any information about her future. He explained Kyle’s plan and said he had cooperated with it.
“That you were blessed by the Star means…”
That must mean he succeeded.
When I went to fetch you, he was already dead. That’s why I could only bring you. As Cardi explained this, Raniel chuckled.
It was an unbelievable tale.
The fact that he had slain the Demon Lord was also hard to believe. Did he go back there again to face the Demon Lord he feared so much? To achieve a great feat?
It was all stories that were hard to believe.
Yet the proof that it was true lay right here. The fact that she was alive, the starlight dwelling within her was that proof. As she dumbly listened to Cardi’s tale, Raniel suddenly let out a chuckle.
“…ha.”
The laugh that slipped out was dry.
“Really.”
Raniel murmured.
“I’m starting to dislike myself.”
“…what do you mean?”
“Don’t you know? Cardi?”
Raniel laughed.
“Even in this moment, I’m looking for the void in your words. And I’ve managed to find it, finally.”
It was a habit.
A terrible habit.
“Cardi.”
She slowly rose to her feet.
She reached out and grabbed Cardi by the collar.
“Where’s the body?”
“…”
“Where’s his body?”
“That…”
“You didn’t bring it because he’s dead, right? Don’t lie. You would have brought at least the corpse. You would have at least said it was burned. You, who knows Phantom Territory, wouldn’t leave a body there. Where’s the body?”
“…Raniel.”
“He isn’t dead.”
“Wait—”
“He isn’t dead.”
Raniel’s lips trembled.
“He couldn’t die, could he?”
“…”
“What do you think this damn starlight is whispering in my ear, Cardi?”
【Fulfill the given fate.】
【Disaster, kill Kyle Toven.】
“Disaster, kill Kyle Toven.”
Cardi’s eyes shook.
Raniel smiled.
“What does this mean?”
Kyle Toven had become a disaster.
The act of slaying the Demon Lord was what he aimed for, Cardi explained. The star said that Kyle had become a disaster. Raniel could easily imagine what had happened between those two sentences.
Ganikalt van Galatrick.
Kyle had met a similar fate.
The boy who admired Ganikalt and wished to emulate him had ultimately met that very same end. Raniel’s lips opened and shut repeatedly.
“Cardi.”
Raniel managed to squeeze out a word.
“Did you… expect it to turn out like this?”
“…that is—”
“You cooperated knowing it, didn’t you?”
Cardi closed his eyes.
Whatever he said would be accepted, and if she wanted to vent her anger, he would let her do so. With Cardi’s eyes closed in front of her, Raniel raised her hand. She clenched her fist but eventually let her hand droop.
“No.”
Raniel murmured.
“This can’t be.”
“…”
“I wouldn’t wish for something like this, and you know that. Why, why did you do it?”
Her voice trembled.
Releasing Cardi’s collar, Raniel clutched her own throat with trembling hands. A slender neck. Raniel’s nails dug into Cardi’s white skin.
Blood flowed out.
Yet that tiny wound healed almost instantly. The starlight surged, pushing away Raniel’s nails from her skin. The blood flowed, but there was no wound. It was the recovery power, like that of a hero.
“Why did I become a hero?”
The moment she looked into Raniel’s eyes, Cardi swallowed hard. Because there was a Raniel displaying the same expression as her, one who came from the future.
“I didn’t wish for this. I did want to live. I did think that this ending was undesirable. Still, this is not right. This is… this is not right.”
“Raniel.”
“This is wrong.”
Raniel smiled.
She laughed while crying.
She thought that if she got up, she should write a letter to Kyle. For the first time in a long while, she really thought of opening herself up to him. Because there wasn’t much time left for her… she hoped not to have regrets.
But that opportunity vanished.
As always, Raniel could not wear a mask. The mask, once removed, could not cover her face again. With her bare face revealed, Raniel was just another ordinary human.
Afraid of death.
Afraid of what she lost.
A human hiding wounds that had festered for too long.
“I… I…”
All that remained were regrets.
A broken moan slipped from Raniel’s lips.
*
